Thursday, March 26, 2009

What's Your Story?

I have an internal dialogue often going on in my head which seems reminiscent of a narrative.( I do not hear voices). If you can imagine a sports broadcaster who is the play by play commentator, that would be a fair description of my self talk. The important thing is to attempt to keep your self talk positive, non judgemental and the way you'd want your best friend to cajole or coax you.The tone of voice you use is also significant. It shouldn't be harsh or overcritical. A sense of self deprecating humor might also be the right voice you want to listen to.

Some people have little songs singing in their head. If people are music lovers that is probably what they are listening to sans ipod/mp3. I often wonder when people behave a certain way what they are possibly thinking. It's not really productive to let yourself become too distracted by what you think other people are thinking because this distracts you from your own internal dialogue.Perhaps this internal dialogue is actually insight and intuition expressing itself. We need to listen to that because it is our own reality check.

Everyone has their version of their own life narrative which actually becomes our each unique story. Patterns of thoughts influence our perceptions. My own story usually reflects attempts to keep myself on track and offering gentle guidance. I try to be benevolent when I interpret my reactions yet this is likely the source of my own internal struggle not to judge myself harshly. I try to stay in "real time" avoiding the pitfalls of history and not let the past dictate my present or future. I think this may be where alot of people go off in the wrong direction. Yes, we all have a history, our collection of experiences and perceptions, but we don't need to let it effect us in the "now".

During the day I will sometimes hear myself saying things that at times are slightly irreverent.I have to admit I sometimes find my own thoughts amusing and have actually laughed at something I was thinking while in the midst of daydreaming or battling distraction . If I stray too far I can find myself off track and have to catch myself not to be negative or judgemental in my thinking towards people who may not conform to my sensibilities.

Intellectualizing may be a trap to fall into. Catching yourself at it takes a certain amount of awareness and practice. It really requires being honest with yourself. I think I'm fairly proficient at catching myself intellectualizing because it usually means I am distancing myself from my own feelings.

If you were writing your own story and you were the main character how would you view yourself, hero, villain ,comic ,wise?

We are all authors.


MilesPerHour said...

Interesting... sometimes a hero, in the past I was evil, not "brainy" intelligent yet having much wisdom. Sensative, insecure at times while confident bordering on arrogant at others.

Madame DeFarge said...

Interesting post. I sometimes feel as if I'm watching my life in slightly detached way, not a bad way, just rather too aware of how I must look to others. Sometimes I catch sight of myself and feel as if I'm looking at a stranger. Again, not in a bad way, but just a sense of detached curiosity.

If I was writing my own story, I'd probably put it all in the third person. To provide some distance. And I'm be a morally ambiguous character who'd come good in the end.

underOvr (aka The U) said...

Hi gaf85,

I would be flawed, not funny or witty but not serious enough to be concerned with what others think of me. I am someone who struggles yet finds a way to persevere and overcome.

I can easily see myself as a hero or villian; it all depends on the storyline.


gaf85 said...

Miles, You forgot to mention that you are also a gentle soul.

Madame,I concur,sometimes being self conscious is part of the self talk.

U, Your philosophy is a healthy reflection of you!

Michael said...

I don't label myself, or the people in my life, as heroes or villains. People are complex, so diverse, so multidimensional, so emotional, so thoughtful, so layered.

I often look in the mirror, reflect upon my own actions and personality, and to me, my character is blank. I don't see anything. It's hard for me to see anything.