Saturday, November 1, 2008

spontaneous Wine buzz

It's Friday night, time to unwind. A few glasses of wine and lowered inhibitions. Do you say things that ordinarily you might be protective about....? Too bad you can't say or think those things while not under the influence of the wine buzz. Why is it necessary to get a buzz going and why not be real all the time? Maybe you think you are more amusing or funny after having a few. Why can't you just be real or spontaneous without the effects of alcohol? Sometimes it serves as a social lubricant for people to be less inhibited. The danger in that is you may sometimes make choices or decisions that you might not otherwise make. Hopefully, it isn't something major. Why do we need this in order to feel less inhibited, maybe more outgoing or less self conscious in social situations.Unfortunate as it is, it applies to alot of people of all ages and economic backgrounds. I myself have no problem with that. I think I'm much more amusing and jocular after a few glasses of whatever. It shouldn't be used as a crutch though , but unfortunately it often may be so.Maybe it is more about people being less unguarded and more real but alcohol doesn't necessarily make anything real. What's wrong with having a a bit of fun, but why do we need alcohol to feel that? Why can't we be less guarded and real with out the effects of alcohol?
My family has a few embarrassing stories they like to tease me about because I am a lightweight when it comes to the consumption of alcohol. Not like the old days at all. With age, we hopefully learn moderation, however for addictive personalities that is likely somewhat different. Not everyone who imbibes too much has an alcohol problem. I won't even get into those who have a few tokes of the weed.You really can't do that because the illegality and consequences are too high risk in today's society besides not wanting to be a space cadet anymore and seeking legitimacy.I guess the whole point is to try and be in control even though you might not be but don't know that. There is nothing worse than being around an obnoxious drunk who has had too much to drink. I have seen people whom I love and respect make utter assholes of themselves but hey, who am I to judge. All is forgotten the next day unless you do something really bad. UNwittingly you can develop a bad reputation and may not even know it, things you may have done in your younger days may come back to haunt you, embarrassingly so. When I was in my twenties I went to an outrageous Halloween party that got way out of hand and the last thing I remember was puking my guts out in someone's bushes. So much for being the future mother of two children.Please forgive my youthful indiscretion. Thank god I don't do those things any more. My adult children unfortunately saw the old side of me when I had a few too many, not by much, but enough for me to act somewhat foolish. Apparently, while trying to put a parka on over my head, I put it on backwards, they still laugh about it but I wonder if somehow I became diminished in their eyes , or perhaps they just thought it was hilarious to see their mother having a few. I'm not really sure, but I have also seen them have a few too many and prefer not to judge, so maybe they won't judge me. Maybe we just shouldn't judge each other too harshly since we really don't know what is going on in other people's minds. I don't really care what other people think of me. I'm rather fearless when it comes to that. I do deeply care what my husband thinks of me, and he thinks I'm okay. I don't necessarily need his validation but if he disapproved of something I would definitely take that into consideration, unless he also was under the influence and then who knows really. Alas, confessions of a hope fiend, an unguarded moment.

5 comments:

Tatum Reid said...

So True...why can't we be who we are, without alcohol...What a feat of boldness and self-certainty if we can accomplish that!

gaf85 said...

Thanks for your comment. Alcohol should be like desert it's okay to indulge a little but if it's too much it's a problem.Yes, we shouldn't have to use alcohol to make ourselves feel better.

Anonymous said...

i had been drunk. it all happened when i was still stupid. haha. influenced by some nut cousins and some chugger uncs., and for most part, i was at fault too. greatly 'cause of my desire to look cool. really stupid, eh? but one time, 'cause i wanted to 'talk' with somebody. it's the worst embarrassing experience i ever had! the rest experiences happened when with my relatives, so it's okay and it's fun remembering. but this one, i only knew him by voice! and i was blabbering all kind of stupid stuff, like that.. from then i became more careful and i began moderating myself. what you said in the comment you gave me was very true. sometimes mistakes helps us find wisdom.. but the damage was already done. :O

Anonymous said...

It was hilarious when you did that with the parka, also when you thought that Mexico was a state in the US.

gaf85 said...

Like mother like daughter.