Saturday, January 3, 2009

Innies and Outies

It's hard to often tell whether people have innies or outies. In colder climates where clothes are necessary to keep us warm the midriff is often covered. In the summertime when clothes are more abbreviated sometimes there may be a glimpse of the belly button.There are also ones that are pierced with a gemstone.

As a member of the Navel Academy I would be classified as an innie. When the umbilical cord is severed at birth is it merely arbitrary which one we end up with? A long time ago in the sixties an old pickup line was "What's your birth sign?" My reply would have been "I was born on the cusp of Aquarius and Pisces". If someone were to ask if I was an innie or an outie my response would have to be "I'm an innie." Perhaps for some this might be a bit too personal. Would this also include "boxers or briefs?" It is what it is ,depending on your definition of what "it" is.( If my quotes seem obscure, I'm referring to our former Prez, BC.) I wonder if he is an innie or an outie?

I have often wondered how lint collects in some people's navel yet not in others. I also wonder if this is at all related to whether you are an innie or an outie. It might be difficult for lint to collect in an outie because there isn't much of an indentation. Is the presence of stomach hair a contributing factor? Someone should research this.The Incan culture believed that Cuzco was the navel of the universe.

The expression " contemplating my navel" refers to a semi meditative state.When I blissfully lay on the beach I am definitely in a state of contemplating my navel. However, I am long past the days of displaying my navel in public. I will leave that for the young damsels in their tiny bikini's. In this current time their are also some tattoos adorning themselves which makes it rather amusing if you enjoy people watching.I've noticed that women have as many tattoos as men now. When I was growing up in my teens the only people who had tattoos were men who had been in the military (or graduates of the Navel Academy). Now it seems those barriers have been broken while we see not so young females with all sorts of artwork showing in some rather interesting places.I think in some work places that might be a turn off. I don't think I would enjoy seeing my gynecologist (male or female) displaying a cartoon character on their forearm during my examination, nor my dentist either.

So the next time you are being introduced for the first time to someone and the conversation begins to fade towards boring why not ask them if they are an innie or an outie and then you can also compare tattoos. Who knows they might be a doctor or a dentist.


underOvr (aka The U) said...


Thanks so much for providing me with something to fill the dead air when me and the "brothers" get together....

"Yo man, are you an innie or outie?"
What you talking bout man?
"You know, are you in or out?"
In what? What the hell are you talking about U?
(uncomfortable silence)......
"Nevermind, did you that KJ dunk last night?....."

See, I tried, but I almost got my Man Privileges revoked!


MilesPerHour said...

I'm sticking with the tat conversation right from the start. The other day the checkout guy at the store asked me about my tats. Imagine me saying, "Yeah, I got this tiger cuz it symbolizes strength and my badass St. Michael blah, blah, blah and by the way can I see your belly button?

gaf85 said...

U, LOL, You never mentioned if you were an innie or an outie or is that too personal?
Could you explain the meaning of "JK drunk". I'll vouch for your man privliges.

gaf85 said...

MPH, I imagine your tats are good conversation starters. What other tats do you have besides Tony the Tiger? LOL.

Madame DeFarge said...

I'm not sure if i would ever dare ask someone about their navel. It may lead to unwarranted expectations of interest in knowing the answer.

Maybe we should add 'innies' and 'outies' to the list of religion, sex and politics that we Brits never discuss at dinner parties. It could be an important matter of etiquette.

yolanda said...


thanks sp much for your comment on my blog gaf85, adn for becoming a follower. i hope you enjoy what you read. by coincidence i happened to be browsing yours at around the same time! i really like your post on questioning our own mortality.

it's always great to meet another soul who enjoys to question :-)

lovely blog - i like te mix of seriousness and lightness. i will defo continue to drop in.

peace and love,

gaf85 said...

Madame,Maybe there is a first time for everything.Etiquette be damned. You mentioned your list of subjects avoided at dinner parties besides religion,politics and sex but why are potty jokes so enjoyed by the English? Just joking of course. Maybe that is a misconception.